A dark and stormy night, 2011

The 2011 winners in the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced, given to the writer who comes up with the worst opening sentence for an imaginary novel. This winner in the purple prose category is my favorite:

As his small boat scudded before a brisk breeze under a sapphire sky dappled with cerulean clouds with indigo bases, through cobalt seas that deepened to navy nearer the boat and faded to azure at the horizon, Ian was at a loss as to why he felt blue.

Go here to see all the winners.