Tag Archives: humor

The nation was left reeling yesterday by the revelation that the presidential election of 2008 was a hoax.

The truth at last! The nation was left reeling yesterday by the revelation that the presidential election of 2008 was a hoax. Key quote:

O’Keefe said he also expected the ruse would be unmasked when Obama said that “under my plan of a cap-and-trade system, electricity rates would necessarily skyrocket,” and again when Obama claimed, “I’ve now been in 57 (U.S.) states,” with “one left to go.”

“We modeled the 57-states gaffe on Dan Quayle’s ‘potatoe’ mistake,” said O’Keefe, referring to a 1992 incident at a Trenton, N.J., elementary school in which then-Vice President Dan Quayle added an “e” to “potato.” “We figured Obama would become a national laughingstock like Quayle, (but we) underestimated the tendency of the press and the public to forgive mistakes by people they like.”

Read the whole thing.

So You Lost Your Election

Iowahawk: So You Lost Your Election: An outplacement transition guide for unemployed Congressmen. Key quote:

The road to your new non-Washington career begins with an inventory of your personal strengths and competencies. Read the critical skill list below, and circle the ones that you possess.

* Telling other people what to do
* Demanding money
* Peddling influence
* Talking loudly over others
* Condescension / arrogance
* Threatening, browbeating, arguing
* Narcissism
* Evading responsibility
* Spin control

As a former Washington professional, you probably circled four or more of the above. Yes, there are some private sector industries where these skills are valued – such as journalism, bill collection, professional wrestling, higher education, and carnival barking. Unfortunately, these are all declining industries with low wages and/or fierce job competition. In order to maintain your standard of living, you will probably have to seek employment in other industries where you will find surprisingly little demand for your skills.