A real look at Mark Zuckerberg’s testimony to Congress


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The satire site the Babylon Bee has been hitting home runs all week with a series of posts poking fun at Facebook’s founder Mark Zuckerberg in connection with his appearance this week at a Senate hearing.

From the last story:

Passing a set of tablets around the room, the tech billionaire asked every person present to read and accept the full 335,000-word, 6-point-font document before they could proceed. “If you would please just click the button signing all of your personal data over to me, yada yada yada, we can get this show on the road,” Zuckerberg said calmly before taking a sip of water. “It’s your basic, no-frills TOS. Nothing to worry about in there, I promise.”

The congressmen quickly skimmed the first of the 1,342 digital pages before clicking “accept” as per their customary approach to signing important legislation as part of their daily jobs, according to sources present.

We must remember that Facebook had previously tried to censor the Bee for publishing “fake news,” and the Bee has clearly not forgiven them for it.

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8 comments

  • Tom D

    That link to “Facebook Staffers Coach Mark Zuckerberg On Humanlike Behavior” has to be one of the funniest jokes I’ve read in quite a while. Thanks!

  • Cotour

    Repost:

    SENATOR / CONGRESSMAN COTOUR (I can not decide which I aspire to be) :

    MY QUESTIONS FOR MR. ZUKERBERG:

    Mr. Zukerberg, you say that you have about 20,000 employees working on security at Facebook. Security activities like ferreting out “terrorists” and “dangerous speech”.

    And Mr. Zukerberg you have plainly stated here that where you come from and where you do business, Silicon Valley, is an extremely Left oriented place related to politics.

    Q: Who sets the standards and parameters for these “Security” actions that Facebook takes in the form of banning members and their speech or any other punitive actions including out right banning of individuals or being placed in “Facebook Jail”?

    Q: Are the security actions taken by Facebook a function of personal Subjective judgment on the part of the security employees or are there Objective and neutral metrics laid out that govern these security actions I.E. controlling speech or limiting First Amendment Rights of Americans?

    Q: How are you working to be as neutral as possible related to free speech and your security employees personal opinions and First Amendment Rights of Americans?

    Q: Are you / Facebook focused related to political speech to allow certain speech and limiting other speech based on Facebooks internal political cultural views?

    Can you have your people get back to me with these specific answers please? Thank you.

  • Michael

    They did a good job. I thought that Zuckerberg comported himself very well.

    Alas, I did not believe a word he said with the possible exception that Silicon Valley is a hotbed of progressiveness and that Facebook would not corporate the ICE

    With few exceptions our fearless senators were just as bad.

  • Cotour

    Interesting:

    Zuckerberg on one of his last questions just clarified that the majority of his security reviewers are not located in in very Liberal Silicon Valley.

    But, what are the objective parameters and protocols set by Facebook for their employee reviewers to eliminate any one individual security reviewers personal political or moral perspective and how speech may be limited or even eliminated from Facebook?

    I believe that there has been established that the more Conservative perspectives in the world are discouraged and penalized by the more Left oriented Facebook and the media in general. That has been well established.

  • Cotour

    Jerome Corsi on Zukerberg and Trump:

    https://youtu.be/9O8VPOd3Dsw

    ITS COMING.

  • Max

    Every Democrat should have asked to kiss his ring, and thank him publicly for his substantial donation to their campaigns and popularity. His unequaled help he provided in propaganda for the Obama White House.

    He was not sworn in, it was nothing more than a dog and pony show, CYA for the Democrats. He even admitted helping the prosecution team in finding “Russian” evidence.
    Helping the Democrats cover up the evidence against Hillary and Obama is more like it. His involvement is so deep that his plans for running for president himself have been dashed… For now.
    It’s amazing what money can buy.

  • wayne

    Max–
    yes, he wasn’t sworn in. all just mindless babble.

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