You can’t make this stuff up! An all-natural creamery in Florida has been forced to destroy rather than sell its skim milk because the state’s agriculture department wants them to either artificially add vitamins or label the skim milk “imitation”, even though it came directly from the cow.

Webster’s dictionary defines skim milk as simply “milk from which cream has been removed,” with no mention of added vitamins. But Department lawyer Ashley Davis told a judge consumers expect whole milk and skim milk to have the same nutritional value and that the Wesselhoefts’ skim milk is nutritionally inferior because vitamins are removed when the milk fat is removed. “Ocheessee’s product is imitating — literally imitating — skim milk,” Davis said.

Judge Robert Hinkle said he’s not so sure consumers expect skim milk to have the same nutritional value as whole milk. “You know something’s been removed in order to make it skim milk,” he said. Hinkle also seemed to have problems with the word imitation. “It’s hard to call this imitation milk. It came right out of the cow,” Hinkle said. “Anyone who reads imitation skim milk would think it didn’t come out of a cow.” [emphasis in original]

The article also describes the story of a sausage company destroyed by similar absurd regulations.