A memo from Google advising employees on correct thought


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Link here. This memo clarifies for everyone what is expected of Google employees. I especially find this quote informative:

Please remember, as you no doubt read in the Employee Handbook, Google’s commitment to diversity is complete and unequivocal. Any variance from diversity is not permitted and will be dealt with immediately. It is only when all of us think exactly the same thoughts that we can achieve perfect diversity.

Of course, Google is also completely committed to the advancement of science and human knowledge. If history has taught us anything, it is that science can only flourish where the allowable topics of discussion are highly circumscribed. Approved subjects of conversation are posted throughout the campus, so please look before you speak.

I believe some of the problem lately has been a simple misunderstanding of my last memo. Unfortunately, I mistyped that Google “approves of free speech.” I meant to write that Google must “approve free speech.” I want all of our employees to feel perfectly free to express themselves however their political, moral, or religious beliefs impel them; provided of course that they receive prior written authorization.

Read it all. It really explains everything.

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11 comments

  • Richard

    Bob,

    I’m 99.9% sure that this is a parody.

  • Richard: Heh. I am 100% sure.

  • Let me add this: That you think it necessary to tell me that this is a parody demonstrates the absurdity of Google’s actions this week. It has become hard for people to tell the difference between their actual actions, ridiculous and contradictory, and a parody that is equally ridiculous and contradictory.

  • Andrew

    Yeah. a “Mutually Exclusive Propositions”? Seriously?

    And that NAME? Unoi’m Carasee, Might that not be a deliberate ruse. U no i’m Cara See, You know I am Cara See?

    This reeks of hoax/parody.

  • Joe

    Couldn’t read the whole thing, double plus ungood!

  • Cotour

    Once individuals in the public can no longer tell what is real and true and what is a creation of someones or some entities agenda, the only thing that remains is where THEY decide to draw the line.

    Sound familiar?

    You make an un disputable observation and resulting point of logic about our current reality. It can only get worse.

  • Cotour

    PS: It can only get worse if we the individuals limit ourselves and there by remain blind to where that line might be drawn. Find the line of believability and be able to objectively rationalize and justify moving it and you can do pretty much anything that can be rationalized and justified.

    Its a fairly simple formula which this story and comment panel perfectly demonstrates.

  • Richard

    I agree with you Bob. The actions of companies such as Google are so absurd that the line between reality and parody is tough to discern.

  • Cotour

    Its not the difference between reality and parody, and this is the point that was made, its the difference between reality and a crafted narrative presented and accepted as reality and the inability to reliably tell the difference. Two very different things.

    Parody is about humor and self reflection, what we are seeing is the shaping of a desired perception of reality that delivers a desired result and in turn a belief system.

  • pzatchok

    The only way I knew it was a parody was because I know Google would never leave a paper trail.

  • ken anthony

    It’s April already?

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